I took Jamie back to Liz and Andrew and retreated to my room to wait for news from Jennifer, but my phone remained silent. After an almost sleepless night I found Liz vomiting in the bathroom, her face ashen and worn-out. Tears were streaming down her cheeks as she released her hug from the toilet and looked at me, but she didn’t appear pained or in discomfort. A smile was painted on her face, an unbreakable grin spreading from left to right. She hoisted herself up, took my hands and said, “I wanted to tell you last night but your drama kind of got in the way. I’m pregnant!” My mouth fell open and a hot wave of joy rushed through me. I hugged Liz delicately and congratulated her. She pulled me closer and said, “For crying out loud, Lee. Give me a proper hug, will you? Lord knows we both need it.” While we stood there, in Liz’s bathroom, both still dressed in our PJ’s, our arms wrapped around each other, she whispered in my ear, “Oh, and Andrew has asked me to marry him.” This sort of put things in perspective for me.

Liz’s news knocked me on the head and taught me there’s more to life than self-inflicted drama. Over breakfast we kept bursting out in fits of giggles, like giddy school girls about to get their first sex-ed class, and I forgot about the shame. It felt so good to just sit there and be stupidly happy for a bit. When Andrew woke up he walked straight over to Liz and kissed her like I wasn’t in the room. Their uncomplicated bliss almost moved me to tears. So it could really be that simple? Drama, cheating and unavailability are not required for success in love. It was kind of an eye-opener. And for the first time I could clearly see what I wanted. I didn’t want Claire who made me accept rules I couldn’t possibly follow. I didn’t want Nathalie who was married and left her husband for a woman − I wasn’t the woman. I was only good enough to facilitate her understanding of what she really desired. And I didn’t want Jennifer, who was Kim’s girlfriend. I didn’t want her to leave Kim for me because I didn’t want to live with that guilt. I wanted them to work some crazy lesbo magic and get past it somehow. All I wanted was to meet someone who was completely available, someone with a firm belief in traditional relationships of the non-open kind, someone with a proven track record of at least bisexuality. Someone who would want me not because I was a forbidden treat, not because she wasn’t getting any at home, not because being with someone half her age awakened her libido and fed her ego. I wanted someone who just wanted me because of me, with all my dramatic imperfections. Was that really so much to ask?

While living at Liz’s I had spoiled Jamie with morning runs on the heath because my gym was too far out of the way to make a pre-work stop. Jamie was darting all over the kitchen, getting visibly agitated because I hadn’t taken him out yet. I told him, “Come on, Jamie, give me a break. I deserve one after what happened last night.”
“What happened?” Liz asked.
“Mister Jamie here only ran off to take a late night bath in his favourite pond. And on my way to find him, I caught Ben giving a blow-job to a stranger in the shrubs.” Andrew spurted his coffee all over the table and Liz brought her hand to her mouth. “I’m sorry for these unsavoury words over breakfast but I’m just relating the harsh realities of life.”
“You do mean Alex’s Ben?” Liz asked.
“The one and only.”
“Are you going to tell him?”
“Oh no. Gay boys do what gay boys do. It’s really none of my business.”
Liz hesitated for a second and then said, “It’s just that Alex has told me many times how he hates it when Ben goes cruising on the Heath. I think you should tell him.” And in under a minute life became complicated and dramatic again.

To be continued…