“Is there no man in your life?” I asked. It was ten o’clock. We were on our fourth bottle of wine. I still hadn’t heard from Jennifer. In my head she was fucking Kim in the swivel chair in her office while whispering in her ear how much she still loved her − and that I had been a stupid mistake.
“Nope, all the good ones are taken. There are no more men left for Lucy.” She was pretty plastered. Her frame seemed sturdy enough to hold some liquor, but I could tell, by the way she sipped from her glass, that she wasn’t much of a drinker. “Not that I’m bitter or anything.”
“Well, I’m sure you could find some takers in the office.”
“What? Those school boys? I thought we were talking about men here? And hush, no office talk.” She tried to give me a stern look, but burst out laughing instead. It was odd seeing her in jeans like that. At work she was always so dressed up, not a hair out of place. She had kicked off her heels and her legs were dangling over the armrest of the sofa. I wondered what she would say to me on Monday.
“When was the last time you went on a date?” I asked.
“Exactly two weeks ago. His name was Stuart and all he talked about was golf and horses, two subjects I know absolutely nothing about and I have no desire of changing that any time soon.”
“Where did you meet him?”
“A mutual friend set us up. She had assured me we would be a good match. We’re no longer on speaking terms, not for a while anyway.”
“It can’t have been that bad?”
“Oh no? Try shagging a guy who has a pinkie finger for a cock.” I didn’t see that one coming. I spurted my wine all over myself in an effort to avoid staining Eleanor’s couch. Now I definitely couldn’t wait to hear what Lucy would say to me on Monday − in the cold hard and sober light of day. She was laughing uncontrollably now.
“You slept with him?”
“Yeah. But I felt so betrayed, you know. Chelsea, my friend who had arranged for us to meet, must have known about his dwarf-sized penis. They had a short affair a couple of years ago. So why would she insist that I go on a date with him? She must think very little of me. Very little indeed.” She giggled like a school girl.
“But why did you sleep with him, if you didn’t even like him?”
“Why? Because it had been ages since I’d had a−”
“OK OK, I get the picture. Time out, please.” I got up and took the bottle of wine away. “No more of this for you, boss. I’ll get you some water.”
“Thanks, Lee. You’re an angel.”
“Can I have that in writing, please? In case I ever have to blackmail you.” I shoved a large glass of water in her hands. “Drink all of it. I’ll call you a cab.”
“Oh, don’t bother. I live two streets from here. The walk will do me good.”
“I’m taking you home then. I wouldn’t want you to land in the gutter somewhere.”

Lucy tried to stand up, but immediately fell back in the couch. I grabbed her hand, pulled her up and put her arm around my shoulder. Her blouse was totally wrinkled and a few buttons had popped open. Her hair smelled of flowers, her breath of alcohol. I slung her coat over her back and dragged her to the front door. I fumbled with the lock for a couple of seconds and then we were out on the streets, Lucy’s head resting on my shoulder, her hands holding on to me for dear life. She was completely wasted. We had only taken a few difficult steps when, out of the darkness, I heard my name being called. It was Jennifer, finally.

To be continued…